EXPERIENCE OF LOY RODGERS...

The years went by, the year 1950 I reached 18 years of age in Feb, word came to me that the Pleasant Springs Missionary Baptist was having a revival, from some cause I had a strong desire to go. So my Dad and Aunt, carried me one night. When the invitation was given I went up, however I cannot remember what was said.



When I arrived home that night and went to bed, a darkness came into my Soul that I believe revealed to me what I am, a poor lost sinner headed for eternal woe. For days and night I moped around in such agony of Soul, wishing I had never been born, or could exchange places with some dumb brute,who had no soul. I cannot find words sufficient to describe my utter despair. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. (I never united with the Missionary Church).

My Dad took me to different Dr's trying to find my problem, I am sure he was perplexed with me, not being able to find what was wrong. I didn't tell him, it was a problem that no Dr. could cure. I don't recall how long this went on but for some weeks. I remember very well going down into the cow pasture falling on my face to the earth, attempting to call on the Lord for deliverance from this terrible agony of soul. During all this time I felt, I was sure for banishment into the regions of everlasting woe, I do not have words sufficient to describe the state of mind I went through.

During this time an Aunt came to visit and had me to go home with her. While at her home I saw a Signs Of The Times, of which I had never seen one before. I picked it up and began to read. And Behold I was reading an experience of Grace, I had never even heard of an experience of Grace. There was something that lifted me,and gave me a glimmer of hope. I was reading of someone that had seemingly gone through the same thing that I was experiencing.

I distinctly remember where I was, when a ray of deliverance (Hope) came into my Soul, if not deceived, and that terrible agony of soul was lifted,and a ray of hope appeared. However this uplifting of Spirit lasted but a short time, and I thought perhaps that it was just an imagination of the mind I had experienced.. However the agony of soul that I was previously in never came back. Now that worried me, so I tried to return into that terrible state again and I could not bring back that agony of Soul to re-experience it.

That first experience has now been 68 years ago. I feel much of the time in the valley, I fear that I might be deceived in it all. When it pleases the Lord, I am granted glimpses of what I consider a lively hope & deliverance, which I cannot retain, however much I try. I go day by day asking the Lord to grant me a thankful heart for all the blessings he has bestowed, and he be pleased to give me a measure of assurance. Three or four years go I went through an experience of uplifting when I felt a very great measure of communion and measure of assurance.

I am now in my 86 years of age, and have no more feeling of being able to approach unto God than when I first believed. My Prayer is "draw me O Lord and I will run after thee".

In my lifetime I have seen many changes, I can remember years ago when the Old Baptist Churches would have many come to meetings, at Associations the house would be full . Now 7 or 8 is a pretty good attendance. However I believe that is all in the Lord's hand.

The hymn: 

I am a sinner here below
and what I am tis hard to know, 
I am so vile so prone to sin 
I fear I am not born again. 
I have many doubts and fears. 
I am about to reach sundown in my life, 
and hope and pray, 
unworthy tho I be. 
My name be found 
written in the Lambs Book of Life.

I hope a Brother,

Loy